last nite i had a nightmare, but not about you, however i thought about that one time, i dreamed we were thru. you said it wasnt a bad dream, a nightmare it seemed, yet you took us there, so now i swear, all of this cant be. last nite was a nightmare, and you can blame it on me, for throwing my heart to you and letting you have the key. what a mistake, to at midnight on your birthday, call you, text you, aim you, and try to make it so great. i'm a fool for staying up late, oversleeping, missing the bus, i was really wasting time when i thought i was building trust. shame on me for stressing about sending you a christmas card before the day came, and letting my family see you wen we chatted on aim, damn shame, im so lame, to ever on my papers write your name, when it turns out all of this was just your little game. i wasted my time caring, when your heart you werent sharing, i bet it belongs to another girl, i hope your child she isnt bearing, becuz i been there done that, but i thought you were something new, i take back all those skype kisses to you i ever blew. i was dumb for playing battle ship, monopoly, and sexting so much, guess you must be laughing at me for me wanting your touch. and valentines, will you be mine, to you it was all a joke, i really wished it coulda last longer, but now when i talk i seem to choke. never will i care again about your grades, whether or not you have aids, if everything at work is okay, because starting right today, i realize that to you i could never exist, even though my blood is spewing at my wrists. i opened up, to you, just like my cuts, have a good life without me, and go bust some nuts. i'll be here, with a gun to my head, constantly shedding tears. last night really hurt, i tossed and turned sleeping with a broken heart, but for you i hope living without asia is the hardest part.